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Archives Called to Marriage
‘God knew what I needed in a spouse’

March 25, 2020

By Suzanne Pietropaoli
Staff Writer

OGDENSBURG – In many ways, theirs is a very modern love story: Jesse and Stacey Sovie met online in January 2015. Even so, they point out, “We continually marvel at the awesomeness of God and his love for us as we look back and reflect on how he brought us together and blessed our relationship.”

“After multiple failed relationships and a prayer to God for my future husband, I started searching CatholicMatch again,” recalls Stacey. “I was finished ‘settling,’ and could not believe it when Jesse’s profile appeared. All the qualities I was looking for were there! I wanted someone who was strong in his faith, and that I could grow closer to God with. I was looking for someone who was honest, respectful, loving, who could make me laugh, who wasn’t trying to change me. A big thing for me was that I wanted a family. God knew what I needed in a spouse and Jesse had it.”

That same evening, 145 miles away from Stacey’s home in Sheldon, Vermont, Jesse Sovie, at his home in Ogdensburg, found Stacey’s profile and was equally impressed. He, too, had stepped away from dating for a while.

“At that point in time, I knew I wanted to find someone who shared the same passion for the faith that I had,” Jesse said. “CatholicMatch seemed promising because on the dating profiles, each person had to answer yes or no to a short list of important Church teachings. Stacey had answered ‘Yes’ to all those questions, so I knew we had that in common before we even started communicating. That was so important to me.”

As the couple connected, their appreciation for each other quickly deepened.

“Once we started talking to each other,” Jesse explains, “we talked with such ease that it felt we had known one another for years.”

“Messages (more like novels because they were so long!) turned into phone calls which led to our first date, followed by many more,” Stacey added.

That first date began with meeting for Sunday Mass at a parish in Vermont.

“I still remember that moment so well,” Jesse said. “The feeling I had, sitting next to Stacey in the pew as we worshipped together at Mass, was unlike any other. There was a total sense of peace, a sense that felt so right, like we were truly meant to be there together. As I found out later, Stacey also experienced those exact same feelings.”

Many more dates followed, and the couple continued to message and call to bridge the distance between their hometowns. Jesse proposed on Valentine’s Day, 2016, and he and Stacey were married at her home parish in Sheldon, Vermont, on May 13, 2017. It was also the 100th anniversary of the Blessed Mother’s apparitions at Fatima – a perfect, the couple says, “because Our Lady has always had a special place in each of our lives.”

Establishing their home in Ogdensburg, the couple discovered new depths to their love for one another.

“To say that marriage is what I thought it would be, before I got married, isn’t accurate,” Jesse said. “If anything, marriage has been a blessing beyond anything I could’ve imagined. While there have certainly been times when Stacey and I had disagreements or suffered hurt feelings, our love and faith have always been the key to overcoming those bumps in the road. Both of us know the other isn’t going anywhere and that our love and commitment are larger than any obstacles that may try to get between us. Love and forgiveness need to go hand in hand to allow growth in any relationship.”

Stacey echoes her husband’s assessment.

“Marriage for me has been a huge blessing,” she said. “Every day I get to stand beside someone who has not only become my best friend, but someone who loves me unconditionally, even on my worst days. Together we have helped each other grow in our love and in our prayer life. We have had some challenges, but we have worked through them together with love and prayer. We have both learned that communication is a vital part of making our marriage work.”

Building a family together was a dream this couple shared from the beginning of their relationship. On September 12, 2018, their first child, Rebecca, was born; their second baby is due on April 18.

“When you hold a child in your arms after anticipating their birth for nine months,” Jesse relates, “so much joy and awe hits you at once. The reality also hits that you are personally responsible for this life that you helped bring into the world.”

Stacey, who is fulfilling her dream of being a stay at home mom, agrees.

“The best moments of parenthood can never be topped by the moment we held our miracle for the first time,” she said. “Seeing her and knowing that she is a gift from God truly humbles me. I realize how blessed we are to have her in our lives when I see her grow each day and hear her laugh.”

“Parenthood has changed me in ways that would be impossible without God’s grace,” Stacey added, “like an increase in patience when Rebecca is not behaving. The ability to sacrifice is probably what has changed me the most. It’s not just sacrificing for myself or Rebecca, but for the whole family.”

Jesse refers to parenthood as “the new normal of planning and preparing, not just for ourselves but for our children. Now when we make decisions, we must discern what effects they will have on our time, commitments, and family life.”

Jesse, a data management technician, explains that they are careful to discern their various parish commitments at St. Mary’s Cathedral Parish, where they now serve on the Pre Cana team for marriage preparation. There, and in this space, they emphasize the importance of “taking the time to discern properly if the other person is right for you. Make sure God is part of your relationship. Seek honest input from someone you trust who can see your relationship more clearly than you can. Marriage has a way of bringing our selfishness to light. Embrace this as an opportunity to grow in virtue. Surround yourselves with other couples and individuals who share your faith and values. Be sure to continue a regular date night with your spouse.

There is more to learn about your spouse even after marriage, so never quit those fun dates. Make sure God is part of your relationship. Pray often and pray together!”



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