November 20, 2024 “When a medical provider starts a sentence with, ‘at your age,’ nothing good ever follows.” While I was cracking a joke, I also meant it. “At your age” tends to be followed by some description of how my body is changing, usually in some way I wouldn’t choose for myself. “At your age, metabolism starts to slow down.” Great. That’s exactly what I needed. I already gain two pounds if I so much as look at a pizza. “At your age, it takes longer to recover from these things.” Ugh. Nothing says fun like being hurt or ill longer. Last week, I was spending some time venting to a friend about a couple of these “at your age” sentences uttered by a medical provider in my direction recently. The conversation – combined with all the happenings of my son’s senior year of high school – had “left me with the sads,” as I like to say, about age and change. “This stinks,” I said. “I’m sick of all these changes I don’t want.” “I feel like God gives us a lot of good changes, a lot of gifts at this age, too,” my friend said. I sort of glared at her. “At our age, our kids start to turn into our friends, even if we still need to be their parents a lot, too,” she said. “At our age, we start to feel confident that our experiences have helped us develop useful knowledge. At our age, we’re not quite as excitable or quick to anger as we were in our younger years.” I have a habit of jumping to extremes. When I’m first reacting to a situation, I view it in black and white – it’s all awesome or all awful. Really, life is a lot grayer and more nuanced. It takes me time and God’s grace (sometimes expressed through the people around me) to change my perspective and become open to the nuances and gray areas. Maybe someday, I’ll even get to an age where God gives me enough grace and perspective that don’t jump to extremes. I’m not at that age yet. |
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